Sooner or later if you truly desire a relationship you must jump in. Make a big splash. When you decide that you are ready to play the dating game, look at it as an adventure.
The grown-up dating game has never been more interesting and challenging. There are more players than ever before. Why? Because of higher divorce rates, longer life spans, and a greater tendency to never marry. This contributes to more single Americans than at any other time in our country's history.
The U.S. Census Bureau tells us that of the 97 million Americans who are 45 or older, almost 40 percent 36.2 million are available singles. There is no shame in being single.
How do we get back in the dating game though? I've tried the online experience several times since I divorced. On Match.com I heard from men who were interested. But I had to weed through the profiles myself, which actually seemed like work after a while. Two of the men I agree to meet were 10 years older than their profile age and another had an online picture of himself at least 40 pounds lighter than when I met him.
Next I tried a site where they do pre-screening -- PerfectMatch.com, the site featured in the movie "Must Love Dogs". Well I didn't get the dog or a date. After hours of completing my profile and their detailed matching assessment, PerfectMatch matched me with one prospect in the 3 months I was a member.
My last experience was with Chemistry.com -- the latest, supposedly most inclusive online dating site. Again I created my profile, put up a decent photo and filled out the personality assessment. It was funny how many of the prospects Chemistry sent were the polar opposite of who I said I was looking for. I was connected though with 2 very nice men who shared that they were getting complimentary Chemistry memberships and had been for months. I inquired about this obvious disparity -- women pay, men don't, but got no clear answer from Chemistry so I didn't renew.
I haven't given up on dating over 50 but here are 7 survival tips I've learned along the way:
1. Get informed.
This isn't the dating scene our younger selves were used to. By far the best midlife dating primer I've run across is an "everything you wanted to know about dating over 50" article by Alisa Miller over at Nerds Do It Better -- and yes they mean that "it"! There are books, CDs, coaches, courses and any number of other resources available elsewhere. But save yourself some money and use Alisa's article to get the lay of the
I'm LOL - not at your comment but because your comment reminds me that I wrote this a while back:-) So I'm really glad the advice is helpful and thanks so much for reminder to circle back for a refresher!! Have a great holiday weekend:-)
Karen
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Happy Dating!
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I have met some really nice men doing the online dating thing. No matches yet, but hope really does spring eternal.
There have also been the funny dates and those that made me say to myself, "I know why you are single". Like the man that invited me to lunch and when the bill came said to me, "I invited you so I'll pay the bill". Really? Who did he think was going to pay the bill? A gentleman would just take care of it without a word.
In a difficult situation once my late husband said to me, "But hon, you'll make a good story out of it S."ometimes when I walk away from a Starbucks date somewhat disappointed I hear him say, But hon, you'll make a good story out of it."
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In regards to dating sites, I've found a lot more success at eharmony than the other personals ads sites like match or lavalife.
I loved the end of your article because it was very hard for me to go into 7-11 and buy condoms! My personal favorite site is
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